Hello! I’m Rebecca Riyana Sang…
… and I know what it’s like to live a life without sexual desire, divorced from your erotic intelligence, wondering if you’re forever broken (or if childbirth, trauma, hormones or heartbreak have ruined you forever)....
I rewrote this story for myself— and then went on to become a sex, love & relationship coach trained in the powerful VIDA method at the Tantric Institute of Integrated Sexuality. Today, I work with smart, successful women who feel shut-down to desire and intimacy. I help them reclaim their sexuality, live a life of passion, and navigate their sex life and relationships from such a place of deep inner wisdom.
I use deep transformational based in modern, proven coaching techniques, as well sacred sexuality practices of the east and west, herbal medicine for balancing hormones, and the jade egg to restore pelvic floor vitality, to teach women to reconnect with their sensual selves, open to radical acceptance of their bodies and their pleasure, and experience deep intimacy & connection with their partners.
It’s tempting to say that it was after my daughter was born that my desire abandoned me. Tempting, because I felt abandoned by the natural vitality and freedom I’d felt in my body before, the pleasure I felt dancing and making love with my partner, the buoyant ease that I seemed to carry myself with-- even though when I looked in the mirror, most of the times I felt shame and could only see my flaws.
My midwife told me to wait at least six weeks to be intimate with Jason again. When I tried, at six weeks, and six months, and two years, I felt like a dead, broken thing. My body alternately felt pain or nothing at all, utterly incapable of pleasure and unresponsive to him in bed, or the sun on my skin, or movement while dancing, or attempting a yoga practice. I was twenty-five pounds pre-baby weight and every day dealt with brain fog, fatigue, and mood swings.
I felt a million miles away from how I’d felt when I was pregnant-- which is the sexiest I’d ever felt in my life. When I looked down at my curvy body, for the first time in my life, it felt totally right and like everything made sense. I felt juicy and graceful, sauntering down the street in the cute maternity clothes I’d bought to show off my belly, making time to go to prenatal yoga three days a week and a massage every other week. Best of all, I had been intensely, easily orgasmic-- especially for my partner, who would soon be my co-parent.
But fast forward a couple years later, and if he touched me at all, even on my shoulder, I felt resentment for his so-called “constant” need for attention. I hated everything about my thirty-eight year old body, which felt old, flabby, and numb. And even though the doctors told me everything was fine, it still hurt to have sex most of the time, and most of what I read online seemed to tell me, well, this is just what it’s like at this phase of life. What did you expect?
Fortunately, everything we’re reading online is wrong. Sex doesn’t need to die with marriage, birth, or getting older.
In fact, it can be better and deeper and more luscious.
I dove into studying the jade egg to restore my pelvic floor health and sensitivity, dug deeper into tantra and other ways of connecting to the energy of my own sexuality, and immersed myself in the VITA method of coaching for sex, love, and relationships, which allowed me to shift patterns of trauma, resentment, disembodiment, shame and self-worth that had been building up in my body from long before marriage and pregnancy.
And I found myself able to connect with to body and my partner in a deep and loving way that renewed our love and my own sense of pleasure and embodiment-- in fact, today, I’m able to experience more bliss, ecstasy, and divine awakening in my sexual experiences with myself and with my partner than ever.
Which is what I want for you, too.
Click here to sign up for my free online workshop, “Lovewitch Alchemy.”
Click here to schedule a “Harmonize Your Hormones + Reclaim Your Desire” Strategy Session.
a Little inspiration…